Someone in Tesco taking the piss in the cake department

http://www.joe.ie/football/football-news...-joke-0017135-1

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/blog/...mario-balotelli

Oooooh Balotelli he's a striker…
He's good at darts
He's got an allergy to grass but when he plays he's fucking class.
Drives round Moss Side with a wallet full of cash
Can't put on his vest but when he does he is the best
Goes into schools tells teachers all the rules
Sets fire to his gaff with rockets from his bath
Doesn't give a fuck cos he did it for a laugh
Runs back to his house for a suitcase full of cash
Ooooh Balotelli …

very good ..

Haha class song that. Can't wait for his next shenanigans.

Wolves at the weekend , got them to hit 5 ...

Hope they walk the league Steve. Would piss so many people off.

me as a Chelsea fan for one ...

He's hilarious isn't he. And what a song. Another reason to love english football culture, the improvised songs.

none better than the Brits ..

Quote by STEVECFC

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none better than the Brits ..

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We won the derby against our local rivals today and one of our new players scored an amazing goal. All people could come up with was chanting his name in different ways, haha. Says it all really. The songs I've heard at games in Britain have always made me laugh.

That song is class! Loved it.

http://soccernet.espn.go.com/news/story/...curfew-?cc=5739

Controversial Manchester City striker Mario Balotelli is facing an internal investigation and possible disciplinary action after breaching the club's late-night curfew ahead of Monday's Premier League match at Chelsea.

Balotelli was spotted in Manchester curry house Zouk in the early hours of Sunday morning despite club rules stating players must not be out socialising within 48 hours of a game.

The 21-year-old Italian, who was not drinking alcohol, signed autographs, posed for pictures with fellow diners and was involved in a mock sword-fight using rolling pins.

City boss Roberto Mancini is tolerant of his players socialising responsibly but the club have confirmed a curfew was in place ahead of the fixture at Stamford Bridge and the manager will ask Balotelli to explain his actions.

Balotelli has made headlines for a raft of unusual reasons since joining City, including causing a blaze by fireworks being let off in his bathroom; throwing darts at a youth team player last season; and driving into women's prison.

Despite his often bizarre behaviour off the pitch, he has show an increased maturity on it, scoring ten goals in all competitions. He is likely to be a substitute against Chelsea.

Sword-fighting with rolling pins

Love his celebration too - just staring folk out.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-...ller-world.html

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why i love super mario balotelli

>Survived a usually fatal disease at birth.
>£10,000 in parking fines.
>Car impounded 27 times.
>£300,000 fine for throwing darts at the youth team.
>Won £25,000 in a casino, gave £1,000 to a tramp outside.
>Rescued a child from bullying.
>Threw tomatoes at som Serie A managers.
>Threw water balloons at Serie A meeting.
>Started a fight with 4 bouncers, after breaking the no touching rule at a strip club.
>Thinks milk with tea is strange.
>Bibotelli saga.
>Had a £120,000 Audi R8 imported and wrote it off within a week.
>Had his friends approach girls in clubs and say "Balotelli will see you now."
>Sent to John Lewis by his mother to buy essentials for the house, like an ironing board.
>Came back from there with a giant trampoline, a Vespa and Scalectrix.
>Started fights with Kompany, Boateng, Tevez and Richards at training.
>Was frequently seen at the AC Milan superstore whilst playing for Inter.
>Went on TV in an AC Milan shirt with his name on whilst playing for Inter.
>U21s game for Italy, he kicked a swedish player while he's down and proceeds to just sit on the pitch ignoring the opposition and the referee for about a minute.
>Is then offended when he gets sent off and protests about it.
>He winked at Ferdinand at the semi final of the FA cup and celebrated in front of the Man Utd fans.
>After the FA cup final, on LIVE TV, says "This season I have been s***. Can I say that?"
>Was stopped by police driving round Hulme (a real shithole) in his maserati with £25,000 cash laid on the passenger seat.
>When asked ''why?'' he said "because I'm rich."
>Had to go off at half time in a game in Ukraine due to an allergy from the pitch.
>Had to be physically hauled away by Zanetti for refusing to let Samuel Eto'o take a penalty that he had won.
>Once broke up with a girlfriend via text while she was presenting a live television show.
>Slept with a model while his girlfriend was asleep downstairs.
>*** mental chicken hat.
>When he won the European Golden Boy trophy, said he had never heard of Jack Wilshere.
>He said he would find out who Wilshere was so he could remind him he came second.
>Drove his car in to a women's prison so he could have a look around.
>Attempted a roulette back heel shot against LA Galaxy and missed.
>Connections with the Naples Mafia, he even testified in court at a Mafia trial.
>Brought iPad to bench during International friendly.
>Set house on fire using fireworks.
>He said that only Messi is "a little stronger" than him, and he is better than all the other players.
>"Why always me?" shirt, made for him by City kitman.
>Drove around Manchester high fiving City fans from his car the day after the 6-1 victory over Man Utd.
>Became the face of a firework safety campaign days after setting his house on fire.
>Hands £20 notes out to strangers when in Manchester.
>Chanted Rooney! Rooney! at the prostitute who claimed to have slept with Wayne.

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What a man he is! Apparently he's put up 24 homeless people in the Manchester Hilton for tonight. This is a great story and I hope it's true.



http://www.joe.ie/football/football-news...years-0019039-1

I do too Andy that is a sound gesture, I looking after 56 homeless folk tonight, should be interesting
Only problem is, it aint no hotel

Quote by OFFHand

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I do too Andy that is a sound gesture, I looking after 56 homeless folk tonight, should be interesting
Only problem is, it aint no hotel

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Well you deserve a lot of credit too Ja for the job you do and of course for spending New Years Eve at work

"He used the toilet before talking to students in the canteen and walking into the teachers' staff room."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/16538969.stm

Been charged by FA.
Four game ban on the way.

good / & rightly so ...

yeah , they wouldn't look out of place at ' The Royal Rumble ! ' ....